The Vanishing button

How easy would it be, she thought? A device where you just press a button and vanish. 

No sweat. 

No blood. 

No tears. 

Just vanish, she thought! 

Her mere existence to all, such an inconvenience after all! 

If only it were easy to end life and move on to the next, and the next, and the next.

Guaranteed "no toxicity".     

Guaranteed "loads of peace". 

Guaranteed "forever sleep". 

Guaranteed "forever happiness". 

Just open the gates, press the button and "pooooof"! 

If it were her choice, she would have made this device long ago! 

All she wanted was to vanish somewhere - where her traces wouldn't be traced, where she could be herself, where she did not have to be someone else. where she could just swim in a limitless ocean and not look back, where she would find a soulmate who would have her for what she is. 

Flowing unbound tears down the cheeks, 
Drenched by a flooded river,

She sank inside forever!

Khwaab

Ek waqt tha jab main tumhara naam chahti thi,

Ek waqt tha jab main tumhari hona chahti thi,

Ek waqt tha jab main bahot kuchh chahti thi,

Meri kuchh khwahishein thi, sapne the,

Kuchh banne ka khwaab tha,

Bas woh bahot kuchh kahin ghum ho gaya,

Yahi sochti reh gayi ki kahan kho gaya,

Jab kaanch tootta hai toh har jagah awaaz goonjti hai,

Par jab khwaab aur dil tootte hain, toh sirf rooh ko pata lagta hain

Khwaab, dil aur rooh barbaad huye,

Bura waqt saaye ki tarah mandraata raha,

Sabne kaha ki bura waqt dhal jaayega,

Par ye nahi kaha ki yahi waqt muskurahat bhi cheen legi. 

Tumne kaha tha ki tum meri kismat badal doge,

Par iss tarah se, ye nahi maloom tha!

Rainy Soliloquies

My heart was screaming for help, no one was there.

When I cried tears of blood, no one came to wipe it.

I was lonely, kept looking for someone to appear in the oblivion.

Someone who would hold my hand and tell: all is well

Someone who would love me unconditionally, 

Someone to tell me I am right,

Someone to hold me tight and tell me not to cry

Someone to say “I am proud of you”

Someone to say “I love you for what you are, who you are”!

Tears kept flowing down my cheek,

Eyes flooded with tears, 

A plea to the heavens for mercy.

A shattered soul full of questions, 

looking for answers.

A void in the heart, a chasm in my existence,

Identity at stake, wishing I was dead.

A pair of tiny hands reach out to me,

Small eyes full of hope looking up to me,

A hug and a kiss, a touch full of hope,

saying, “I love you, momma”.

The heart went aflutter again, 

A soul rejuvenated, revived!